This isn’t the sequel to Guns, Germs, and Steel, don’t worry.
After days of riots across the nation, furiously-typed public pleas (and tweets) for calm and the restoration of law and order, and public outcries of “where the hell are you, the country is on fire” President Trump made a grand public appearance Monday in the Rose Garden of the White House, culminating in an unexpected walk across Lafayette Park to St. John’s Church.
The night before, anarchic rioters set fire to the basement of the historic church, which has been visited by every president since James Madison.
It made for quite the photo op as Trump, brandishing a Bible, stood in front of the barely-saved historical building.
By the next morning, the visit was met with not just a torrent of support, but an outpouring of derision from everyone from the Mayor of DC to the Episcopal bishop of the church over the use of tear gas to disperse protestors minutes before the 7:00PM curfew to allow for Trump’s walk.
Even Ann Coulter got a funny dig in:
It’s anyone’s guess what the internal thinking was at the White House – they wanted the area cleared to avoid a repeat of last night and the church visit was a simple “can we do that?” add-on.
But according to DC police, tear gas wasn’t used by the department to clear rioters – instead it was smoke bombs (per a friend, “Wtf is a smoke grenade supposed to do in an open space? I thought those were for building interiors or for when Batman needs a distraction to grapple hook away to give the illusion that he vanished from the area?”)
The US Secret Service, which was also present, declined to comment.
Watching it live – CNN anchors (looking at you, Wolf Blitzer and hysterical Don Lemon) theorized tear gas was being used as protestors were moved out of the way in anticipation of imminent curfew, which is likely where the conflicting reports began. There’s enough uncertainty to throw some water on the “he purposely tear gassed peaceful American citizens for a photo!” theory.
Later in the evening, Attorney General Bill Barr walked the streets of DC to survey the damage, and bless him for it.
He’s the only Attorney General who knows what it’s like to bring successful federal charges against shitty cops during a riot. In fact, that was his job during the Rodney King trial – which led to successful federal prosecution of the two key officers involved.
The DC National Guard is, unlike state National Guards, directly under the President’s command as his role of commander-in-chief, giving him full jurisdiction. If a Governor of a State declines assistance and a situation deteriorates, the President can assume jurisdiction of the state National Guard forces within that state.
Whatever happened as a result of Monday night’s curfew, though, was a sea change. DC was quiet last night. They had a little protest in Hollywood that calmed down without windows getting smashed in like Saturday, and it didn’t sound like Minneapolis got worse.
Sadly, cops got shot in Vegas and St Louis and NYC was absolute mayhem Monday night.
In the shadow of the 1992 LA Riots, hopefully Tuesday night is better and we can reach our 6-7 day equilibrium to the madness.
Fun Bonus Extra Content!
In yet another addition to Nancy Pelosi’s history of trying and failing to out-Trump the Donald, she stood with reporters today brandishing – wait for it – a Bible, where she recited some passages.
“A time to heal, the book of Ecclesiastes,” she says, adding she hopes Trump will be “healer in chief and not a fanner of the flames.”
Her moment was met with a collective “what the hell was the point of this” when people realized that instead of setting massive distance between herself and the President, she validated the power of the photo opportunity of a President posing with the Bible at a time the nation’s under extreme distress.
A full report on Nancy’s rake-stepping validations of Trump at a later date.
