Now that the 2020 election is over in its unyielding, brooding fourth phase, I’d like to revisit a thought experiment from this summer.
Halfway through the fourth year of the first term of the Trump Administration, President Trump made one of his typical sweeping proclamations which gripped headlines, fueled outrage, and ebbed away quietly only when people moved on to the next thing to be furious about (probably Aunt Jemima, shady bitch).
But this time, the headline was as follows: “Trump Administration Considers Suspending H-1B, Other Visas Through the Fall”.
A scream rang out from Silicon Valley so loud you’d think Juicero went bankrupt.
Per the piece:
The administration has argued that the pandemic requires limits on immigration to prevent sick people from entering the country and to ensure that Americans get jobs first as the economy rebounds.
There’s only one problem: Trump’s been “considering” this since 2015 during the campaign. At this rate maybe existing visa-holders grandchildren will be denied a visa.
Nobody expects government to move quickly. After all, the famed Border Wall, a 30-year work-in-progress, just celebrated the crucial milestone of being a fifth of the way complete.
So it’s not a stretch of the imagination to say any actions to restrict visas could affect the grandchildren of visa holders which we now know is the milestone in which Hispanics/Latinos (not Latinx, that isn’t real) consider themselves to be White Americans.
At this rate, what does that future generation look like? Forget the 2020 election, which may be resolved within the next 40 years, what can we expect by 2060?
Headline: “2060 Democratic-Republican primary candidates run on the ‘Amnesty for Azlan Soldiers’ platform“
According to the party’s spokespersxn: “Just because those brave warriors fought to split the United States doesn’t mean they don’t share North American values! Lincoln would’ve done it, or my name’s not Nimrata Haley-Singh III!”
“The modern Democratic-Republican party embraces change, and it’s time for every Patton statue across the country to come down. Those are no longer our values, nor who we are.”
“The situation in Karankawa (formerly Houston) is tragic, but it’s this party’s policy to keep funding the Judean Federation, the largest democracy in the Levant)”
“We support family values, which includes giving progenitors the choice of which downloadable identity their offspring should have until the age of 10, as well as education vouchers. Choice is a Democratic-Republican value!”
“We commit to keeping military avatars on the ground in United Syria until the job is finished!”
“We stand with our greatest ally, Britain, and support their peace talks with the city-state of London.”
“We believe that every NorteAmerican should take home more of what they earn, and support a tax cut to a fair rate of 50%.”
“Above all, we support freedom. The freedom to choose a LifeCare Plan that works for you and your family, the freedom to download musket schematics, and the freedom to display a NorteAmerican flag.”
Obviously, Barron Trump is our only hope.
